Breathe

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I’ve had a difficult time admitting out loud that I’m a writer. When people ask about my writing I’ll make statements like:

“I like to write.”
“I do a little writing on the side.”
“I have a blog and I regularly contribute to a couple other web sites.”

All of those statements are true. But saying, “I am a writer,” seems to carry a certain set of expectations, like how much you’ve written and if you get paid to write and if there’s anything with actual ink that you can hold in your hands.

But after attending the Breathe Writer’s Conference this past weekend, I have the confidence to say, “Yes, I am a writer.”

Breathe was one of those rare experiences where I knew from the minute I walked through the front door that I was welcome and loved. The first things I noticed were the mirrors on the tables with a note attached to each one that read:

“Look in the mirror and you will see a writer.”

The purpose of the conference was to encourage us to believe in our gift, to realize that writing is a high and worthy calling, and to equip us to go forth and do our very best for God’s purposes. It didn’t matter if you had written a dozen books or no books, a hundred articles or nothing other than journal entries in a notebook, you walked out knowing, “I am a writer.”

Here’s a few highlights from the conference:

Meeting Anne Byle, and realizing that I knew her Dad! Her class on the writing life was incredibly practical and encouraging. She urged us to identify our fears and our dreams and then set goals. She also encouraged us to set aside time, build relationships and to not be afraid to try new things!

Sitting in on a couple of Latayne Scott’s classes. She has an incredible story which includes her previous life in the Mormon church, and an amazing gift with words. God used her class on the spiritual care of the writer to change my every day life and give me a visual to wrap my mind around connecting the seen world we live in to the unseen world God exists in. On my list to read are three of her books The Mormon Mirage, her fiction book also about the Mormon life, Latter Day Cipher, and The Hinge of Your History: The Phases of Faith.

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Meeting Alison Hodges and having an encouraging one-on-one conversation with her. I can’t wait to start reading her blog every day. She’s incredibly gifted and humorous.

Listening to Caryn Rivadeneira’s keynote talks about the three musts of a writer and the joy of writing in community. I picked up her two books Mama’s Got a Fake I.D. and Grumble Hallelujah and am looking forward to reading them over the next few weeks.

Attending Sharron Carrns class on curriculum writing. God’s timing on this one was perfect. I signed up for this conference in July. In September I was asked to participate in a writing project that involves study questions. This class was immensely helpful and I can’t wait to begin to use what she taught us!

Attending the class Tracey Bianchi taught on writing about social justice issues. She has written the book Green Mama, which is also on my reading list. Her passion was infectious and made me think more deeply about the issues God has called me to write about.

Shelly Beach’s class on writing from life was right up my alley. She said that there is power in having the ability to use and access our experiences to move people in some way. Hello, my passion!! It’s not that we need a wild and crazy life with lots of experiences, we just need to have the eyes to see that everything can be an element in a story and learn to mine the unique and creative things in our lives and use them! Shelly has written numerous works of fiction as well as books offering hope and help for those who are caregivers.

I met so many incredible people at the conference and had so many casual, encouraging conversations that it would be impossible to recount them all. I came home exhausted, yet refreshed and filled to the brim.

Thank you Guild Members for this breath of fresh air!

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Around the Web

My friend Susie and I attended the Breathe Writer’s conference this weekend. It was a refreshing and encouraging weekend, and I will be sharing some fun stories about it on Monday.

Until then, I wanted to let you know about a few pieces that I’ve had posted around the web recently.

I wrote about dealing with the consequences of someone else’s sin on Circle of Friends this week.

I had a rather unusual piece of my writing on Susie’s blog this week. I recounted two vivid dreams I once had about God.

A few weeks ago, a piece I wrote about subverting slavery one tomato at a time posted on Catapult.

And if you haven’t checked out Kedron’s photography blog lately, visit here.

Happy Sunday!

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STOP the bullying

We were sitting at a high school football game a few weeks ago when Kedron stood up and walked over to the fence behind the bleachers. He yelled at a group of middle school boys, “BREAK IT UP!! NOW!!!” The group looked at him shocked, and then looked around as if asking, “Who? Us?” Four boys had been pushing around a smaller boy. Kedron returned to his seat, only to get up a minute later and repeat the directive. “I SAID BREAK IT UP! This is NOT how we behave!” This time the boys, wide-eyed, scattered instantly. I was proud of Kedron. In a sea of adults, he was the only one who noticed and stood up to let the kids know this is not how we behave in our community. It is completely unacceptable.

Kedron comes by it honestly. A little while back my father-in-law pulled behind a school bus dropping off a group of high school kids. As soon as the bus took off a group of boys started a fight. He pulled his car to the side of the road and got out and yelled, “WHAT’S GOING ON??!!” The group instantly scattered.

Kids need to know they are being watched, and being held accountable for their actions. They need boundaries, even as teens, to know what is acceptable and what is not, especially when it comes to bullying.

I urge you when you see bullying in action, to be the adult who speaks up. Someone recently shared with me a story from childhood, where in a very public place, for over an hour, adults walked by one after the other, with no one saying a word, only casting glances as if wondering what these kids had done to deserve such harsh treatment.

A friend of ours recently introduced us to a new organization launching this week, called Gloves-On:

“Gloves-On, one of the first charitable apparel brands to fight bullying while supporting anti-bullying organizations and programs across the USA! Your Gloves-On apparel signals that you will defend the people and principles you hold dear. It says you know your Strengths. It says you will confront bullies with action, words, and deeds. Your gloves-on apparel says that you will stand up for yourself and will be a Cornerman for any underdog in the ring of life.”
Check them out and like their page on Facebook here: Gloves-On . Watch the great videos that kids are submitting! This holiday season, keep an eye on their page and consider purchasing some of their apparel for the kids in your life. Do a double duty by letting kids know you believe in their strengths as well as support anti-bullying programs.
.Will you stand up? Together we can make a difference for our kids and communities.

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First kisses and art

Kedron and I have enjoyed hearing the stories come home from school recently. Little Miss has a very good friend who happens to be a boy. He’s super sweet and apparently has a crush on her. The other day she came home from school and announced, “K told me he loved me and kissed me at recess today!” Trying not to appear too shocked, I casually replied, “Oh really? And where did he kiss you?” She pointed to her ribs, and then said with a slightly annoyed face, “It was really weird!” We got some good chuckles out of it, and when I told little K’s Mom, who is a good friend of mine, she about fell out of her chair. Yesterday, she came home saying, “K kissed me again! This time on the shoulder!! We were standing in line after recess!!” T-Rex asked her, “Well did you kiss him back?” Little Miss shrieked, “EWWW!! NO!!!! I’m not kissing a boy until I get married!!!!” And I am bookmarking this post to show her again in a few years!!

T-Rex is loving school and his favorite class is art. No surprise there considering his Daddy is a designer. This week after school he announced, “You should have seen me in art today! I was AWESOME!!” It’s been such a joy to see him start to come out of his shell. A year ago I was nervous about sending him to school, but when the time came, he was so ready and so excited, I couldn’t even be sad that he’s all grown up. He’s blossoming.

He’s been having a little bit of trouble with a girl at school. She apparently has pushed him in line a couple times. After we encouraged him to talk to the teacher if it happens again, and applauded him for doing the right thing by not pushing back and asking her to stop, he looked at us with a serious face and said, “And she is FIVE!! She should know better!!” And then he cocked his head as if confused and said, “But she’s also nice to me because sometimes she cleans up my space at the table after snack!” And now he’s learning that when it comes to girls, you never know what to expect!

And, I leave you with our latest family portrait, as seen through the eyes of our artist T-Rex.
Family picture by trex

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Saying Yes to God

It’s been a busy few weeks in our household. We’re in the third week of school, and the routine is setting in for everyone. I’ve talked to a few other moms and we all agree – we feel like we live in the kitchen. Breakfast served, breakfast cleared, pack lunches, get everyone out the door, with lunches in hand. Clean the mess up, then think about dinner, clear dinner, and do it all over again! It’s definitely a new life for us – one that now includes gymnastics, flag football, and nightly homework. It hit me the other day that this is our phase of life for the next 13 years. It’s been fun to watch the kids grow so much in just a few weeks. Even our dinner conversations have grown as their little minds continue to expand and they begin to take more and more responsibility for themselves.

On top of all that, God has thrown open a few doors for me this year. I spent the summer praying, asking for wisdom for how to spend my (little) bit of free time this year. I’ve felt a stirring in my heart to begin to return to my creative roots. If you know my story, you know I spent the a good majority of the first 20 years of my life in front of people using the creative arts to teach. Over the past year, I’ve started to miss it.

I had an idea in my head of what I thought God wanted me to do – writing, speaking, and encouraging women. Then a good friend approached me about storytelling at church over the summer for the elementary group. I never thought of myself as a children’s worker. I thought it might be fun for the summer. So I agreed. And I loved it. Then they needed help this fall. So I prayed about it, and said yes. So twice a month on a Saturday night, I’m on a stage in front of 60-80 kindergarten through 5th graders. They are an awesome group of kids, and I’m excited to be a small part of their journey, encouraging them to dive into God’s Word and begin to understand how to make wise choices now and for the rest of their life.

Then Bible Study Fellowship called, and asked if I’d teach a preschool class. I was very hesitant. I took a week and prayed over it and talked to Ked about it. The time commitment for BSF is high. I really wasn’t sure about teaching preschoolers. I wondered why God kept opening doors to work with kids. At the end of the week I still wasn’t sure to how to answer them. I thought maybe I should say yes, but I told God it would be really nice if He’d let me know for sure if I should or not. A couple hours later, an email came that couldn’t have been a more clear Yes. I gulped, and committed. And it’s already changed me.

I haven’t been a storyteller in years, and now, every week I’m doing it at least once, sometimes twice a week. My heart is full and alive, and jumping around inside me with joy. The coolest part is that what I’m teaching is what both my kids are also learning (I’m storyteller in Little Miss’s class at church, and I teach the same thing that T-Rex hears in his class at BSF). I’m also more equipped than ever to have conversations and teaching moments with my kids at home.

The interesting thing is that I wouldn’t have said yes to either of these if they hadn’t come in the order they did. If BSF had contacted me before I’d been in the mode of storytelling at church, I wouldn’t have said yes. If church had contacted me after I committed to BSF, I wouldn’t have said yes. God knew what order my heart needed to be opened.

And then, the very week BSF started, I was contacted about a writing project – something I’ve felt called to do since I was in junior high. And I froze. I started to feel overwhelmed. I don’t know all the details and deadlines of the writing project yet, so I can’t share much. I prayed and prayed, and Ked looked at me and said, “You don’t need to pray about this project, because this is what you’ve been praying about for half your life. This is a very clear gift.”

But yet…I’ve already committed to these 2 storytelling projects this year. I wouldn’t have done either of those if the writing project had come along first. As I counseled with several people I trust, including Ked, they all said it seemed to be God’s leading. But I was fearful of being over committed and especially unqualified for the writing project. Saying yes to God can be quite scary. Then one friend reminded me, “He equips those He calls.” I started to see it. Every BSF lesson has pointed towards this writing project and trusting God’s work through the Holy Spirit. Every storytelling session at church has opened my eyes to something new. I went for a run and the ideas started to flow.

It’s not going to be easy. It’s all going to take an incredible amount of focus, discipline and endurance. I know it will be a battle, and I’d appreciate your prayers. I know I can’t do this on my own. Nor should I ever try.

My friend Susie told me one day, “If God has called you to all of this, He will enable you to get it all done.” The week after she told me that, I saw it happen. Preparing for BSF was a pure joy and didn’t take me near as long as I thought it would. I did some writing and it flowed. I prepared for the story at church and had time leftover. Not to mention, I spent an entire rainy morning building legos, long evenings helping with homework and had extra time in the mornings to snuggle, and managed to make dinner every night. It was like there was a magic time box that made every minute count for 2. It wasn’t me. My tag might be “supergirlamelia” but I’m really not super.

In the process I’ve realized some things will sit by the wayside, so I’ll be blogging here 1-2 times a week. I’ll still be at Circle of Friends every Wednesday. I will definitely post here once things are finalized with the writing project and I can share a few details, and would so appreciate your prayers. It’s an exciting and quite scary time. Everyday, I’m trusting God to lead.

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What should you not believe?

Don’t believe everything you think.

That was a bumper sticker that caught my eye on the highway this weekend. I wished I had read that phrase earlier in the day, before I ran my half marathon as opposed to on the way home from the race.

I approached mile 10 that day and started feeling tired. My legs were fine. My lungs were fine. The only thing that was tired was my brain. Endurance running becomes more a battle of the mind than of the body. I was losing the battle of the mind.

Read the rest at Circle of Friends

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Detours with Friends

This past weekend, I had the privilege of attending Circle of Friends’ conference with Carol Kent “Between a Rock and a Grace Place.” My friend Susie and I were so excited to leave our young children in the capable hands of their fathers and have a mini girls weekend away. We set out mid afternoon on Friday to make the 5 hour drive from West Michigan to Canton, Ohio.

As we neared Ann Arbor, Michigan, traffic slowed to a crawl. I kept my foot hovered over the brake pedal while we crept along Highway 23.

Read the rest at Circle of Friends!

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A little salty

I love everything about fall – the slight chill in the air, skylines filled with color, huddling around bonfires, and pumpkin everything! I think I’ve grown to appreciate the short beauty of fall even more after living in Florida for nearly six years.

For some reason, I’ve been especially excited about the fall flavored lattes this year. This past weekend while on a road trip with a friend, we stopped for caffeination and a bold, colorful sign greeted us, “Fall flavors are here! Pumpkin and salted caramel!!” I had walked in fully intending to get a very tall pumpkin latte, but then there was the salted caramel. My friend grabbed my arm, “Salted caramel is here!!” We started squealing and giggling like school girls all while pointing excitedly at the sign (that’s apparently what happens when Moms get out of the house for a weekend!). We were making such a scene that the barista leaned over the counter and craned her neck to inspect the sign saying, “What in the world does that sign say?!” She looked just as confused when we announced, “SALTED CARAMEL!!” Her eyes got round and I ordered, “Two of the tallest size you have please!”

We walked happily out of the shop sipping the slightly salted cup of caramel caffeinated magic, completely re-fueled for the next leg of our trip. Who knew that just a little bit of salt could cause so much excitement? I mean, a caramel latte is good, but a salted caramel latte? AH-mazing. That little touch of salt makes the flavor *POP!*

In my motherhood, I’ve discovered that the smallest amount of salt on vegetables can make the difference between my children eating delightedly or choking them down (or spitting it out). Forget broccoli and cauliflower drowning in cheese, just add a small sprinkle of salt.

As I was chuckling at how excited we got over just a little bit of salt, I was reminded of what Jesus said to His followers:

“You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.

Matthew 5:13

There are two main things salt is used for:

1. Preserving: When canning, salt is used to preserve the food, help it keep its taste and color and survive on a shelf much longer than it could otherwise.

2. Enhancing: As I described above, a little bit of salt brings out the best of food’s flavor taking some things from barely tolerable to amazingly enjoyable.

When Jesus described his followers as the salt of the earth, I think He may have had those two tasks in mind. Life is full of challenges and pain. I have found, that a relationship with Jesus has preserved my own life – taking incredibly difficult seasons of life from barely tolerable, to sometimes enjoyable – not because the situation itself has turned enjoyable, but because of the hope I have in Him, because of the love I experience from Him and from those who love Him. When we are living according to the ways of Jesus, we get to be a little bit of salt, helping preserve the lives of those around us, encouraging them through His love to endure incredibly difficult life situations by walking with them and helping them survive longer than thought possible.

And as for enhancing, Jesus has definitely brought out the best in me, enhanced my own life’s flavor. He continues to take my rather rough edges and soften them, showing me how to love better – how to be a better family member and friend, how to be a better community member – not out of duty or moral obligation, but out of a deep and abiding love for Him and those around me. Without Him, I don’t taste that great, and I’m not very loving! I hope that as I live my life,  I’m spreading His “saltiness” and that others might enjoy being around me, and maybe even get a little bit excited about life, even though the tough things are still there.

So this week, how salty are you?

And as for salt losing its saltiness, come back later this week!


 

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First Day stories

I’ve never heard T-Rex giggle so much. Ever. Apparently it was a great first day of school. How could it not be? We started out with blueberry pancakes topped with strawberries! T-Rex didn’t say hardly a word at breakfast and gulped his pancakes down so fast. Little Miss had to be constantly reminded to stop talking and eat.

T-Rex dashed out the door yelling, “I CAN’T WAIT to ride the bus with my friends!!!” He posed and cheesed for all the pictures in typical T-Rex fashion and then raced down the sidewalk to the bus stop. It was a brisk fall morning, perfect for the first day of school, with a golden sunrise to match the smiles on their faces.

I hurried to school to get pictures of them getting off the bus and lining up with their classes. He was all grins. Little Miss was hugging her long lost buddies.

I took the advice of my friend Cindy, and implemented a tea time after school. It gives us a chance to sit down and talk about their day before they race back outside to play again. We chatted over zucchini chocolate chip muffins. Their stories were hilarious today.

me: So did you have gym, art or music today, T-Rex?
T: We had gym!!
me: So what did you do in gym?
T: Well I was climbing on these things, kind of like what Sissy was climbing on at the park.
me: Like a rock wall?
T: No.
Little Miss: Climbing a rope?
T: No. Kind of like the monkey bars.
Little Miss: That sounds like recess not gym.
T: Oh yeah. Recess. We didn’t have gym today! Just recess.

T: I fell out of my seat on the bus today!!
me: You fell out of your seat??
T: Yeah, the bus was turning a corner on two wheels and I fell out of my seat!!
me: On two wheels?
T: Well, no, not on two wheels but it felt like it was on two wheels!!

Their bus was really late getting home today. Over a half hour late! We have a new bus driver and we moms started to get worried that she might have gotten lost. Finally they showed up, and as they piled out of the bus they exclaimed, “Our bus was soooo late picking us up from school! We were waiting and waiting and waiting!”
T: Yeah, we could have WALKED home by the time she picked us up!
Little Miss: Maybe she was talking on the phone and forgot to come!

me: So, Little Miss, did you have a good first day?
LM: Yeah, sort of.
me: Sort of?
LM: Yeah, the teacher kept talking and talking and talking!

Oh, let the fun begin. I can’t believe I’m the mother to two school-age kids! And I didn’t even get the slightest bit emotional. How could I when they were so excited? I’m happy that they love school. I’ll enjoy that while it lasts!

And for my first day with both kids in school? I was home maybe a total of 1 hour in between a very busy schedule. I have some exciting new adventures of my own this fall which I will share later this week!

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Why I won’t cry on Tuesday

Or at least not cry for very long!

photo courtesy of www.krowphotography.com

These two cuties are headed to school on Tuesday. For T-Rex, it’s his first time going to school. Riding the bus. Eating lunch in the cafeteria. All day. Three days a week.

Last week we met the teachers and delivered the school supplies. We were running out of time and Kedron asked T-Rex if he wanted to do a practice bus ride. He replied, “Nah, I’m a pro. I’ve already done it twice – with Sissy last year and then at Safety Town.” Then he insisted that the teacher we met wasn’t the same one who sent him a letter and picture of herself this summer. When we insisted she was he said, “No, the lady in the picture had shinier teeth!”

My mom asked me if I was going to cry on the first day of school. I shrugged my shoulders and said, “Probably not. I mean, I’ll probably get a lump in my throat, but I doubt I’ll cry.”

She chuckled then said, “Ok, I’ll cry for you.” Then there was a pause and she said, “But come to think of it, I don’t think I cried when you and your brother went to school!”

I don’t want to cry because this is such a monumental occasion for them, and I don’t want them to see me sad and then think that they should be sad. This is a rite of passage, and something they are both so very, very excited about. And they should be excited. They have a great school, with great teachers, and great friends. Crying would just be for me, for my own sadness at how fast they are growing up. But even then, I have a hard time being sad to the point of tears about that. This is the way God intended it. Babies grow into children who begin to stretch their wings in safe environments and learn how to live – how to handle conflict, how to learn, and how to navigate who sits with who on the bus (which they have already discussed at length with their neighbor friends).

I’m incredibly proud of them both. I’ve watched them learn to be good friends and deal with disappointment appropriately, understand when it’s their turn to talk, and when it’s their turn to listen (well at least some of the time!). They’ve even begun to learn how to anticipate needs and meet them before being asked.

And so, Tuesday morning I will wave, give lots and lots of hugs, blow kisses from the sidewalk, and then rush to school to beat the bus and get pictures at school for the photo albums. Then I will go home to a quiet house and recover it from a summer of neglect.

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