Be still my heart

This morning, we had one of those moments that parents of babies/toddlers/preschoolers dream about. I thought around 7:30 a.m. that I heard Little Miss Sunshine open her bedroom door. But then I thought maybe I was dreaming because she didn’t come into our room and wake us up/ask for breakfast/cuddle/tell a story/snooze like usual. I dozed back to sleep until about 8:00. The Narrator was stirring and expressed his surprise at what time it was and that no kids had woken us up yet. I told him I thought I’d heard Little Miss Sunshine get up at the usual time but wasn’t sure. Just as I was saying that, I heard her cough, and it sounded like it was coming from the living room. I got out of bed and padded down the hallway and saw Little Miss curled up on the couch. She looked up and me, smiled and said, “I was just waiting for you to get up!”

Be still my beating heart. And while I was so proud of her for being a big girl and letting us get a little extra sleep, I’m just a teensy bit sad because it also means she’s growing up so fast!!

Spring cleaning gone awry

There have been so many bloggers talking about spring cleaning this past month, and all the chatter has really given me the urge to clean and purge. But with two toddlers in tow, I quickly realized my visions of a clean AND organized house just weren’t going to happen. Instead, I have settled for accomplishing one small thing a day – like cleaning out a bookcase or a closet while they are napping. It took me a few weeks, but I finally made it through the kids rooms which was no small task considering they both needed to move up to the next size of clothes.

Saturday, while they were helping The Narrator in the yard, I decided to tackle our bathroom. I’ve hated our bathroom since the day we moved in. We remodeled the other bathroom, but since we are the only two who ever see our bathroom, it fell to the bottom of the list. I know, that goes against all the marriage book advice. At any rate, we have this tile shower that I loathe. Even after scrubbing it, it just feels dirty. Saturday, I was scrubbing and scrubbing the bathroom when, oops, a tile smooshed into an apparently soft spot in the shower wall. There now is a hole in our shower.

I headed outside and said to The Narrator, “So how do you feel about remodeling our bathroom?” He looked up and said, “What did you do??” I smirked and said, “You know it was inevitable, it was going to happen sooner or later.” I saw him shake his head and begin to mentally crunch the numbers of how much this was going to cost. It’s not the first time. No, about 2 and a half years ago, around Christmas time, he was cleaning the other bathroom when he pushed one of its tiles into the wall. Thus began that remodeling project. So, we know exactly what we have to do, unfortunately! So much for the benefits of spring cleaning!

I moved all our shower stuff into the other bathroom. It’s going to be a month or two before we get to our bathroom. It has to get in line behind finishing the front yard and re-painting the house. That ball is already rolling and needs to come to completion. It’s going to be interesting when the in-laws are here for two weeks and we have six people sharing a bathroom. It will feel just like old times for some of us! Funny thing, though – I took a shower in the other bathroom Saturday afternoon and I couldn’t believe how happy I was in that nice, bright, clean bathroom. I didn’t realize how much I hated ours until using the other one!! The Narrator said the same thing!

On the plus side though – while cleaning our dressers, we found some Motorola walkie talkies that we forgot we had. We put new batteries in them and had a riot tonight with the boys in one room and the girls in another. Smooshed shower — walkie talkies. Win some, lose some!! Happy spring!!

Patience for Provision

Last year The Narrator and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. It passed without major fanfare. With a nursing baby and the fact that we moved 1200 miles from our families, getting away was a bit difficult. Add to that – at the time we were in the midst of snowballing our debt and building an emergency fund. Not a good equation for a romantic getaway. In fact, we didn’t even get out to dinner by ourselves. The night of our anniversary, we took the kids to a favorite mexican restaurant and had a family meal. As we joined hands to pray for the food, The Narrator made a wise comment that set the tone for the evening. Rather than us feeling sorry for ourselves that we couldn’t get out by ourselves, he said, “You know, this is what we signed up for when we said ‘I do’ ten years ago, and it’s kind of appropriate that we are celebrating together as a family. Each year together isn’t just about the two of us, it’s now about the four of us.” I smiled at the man I married, falling even more in love with him at that very second.

We enjoyed a very messy, loud meal, but we were together, and it was nice. We didn’t think too much more about not getting out for our anniversary.

Fast forward to just a few weeks ago. For some reason, I was thinking about Sanibel and Captiva Islands. We only live a few hours away, and I’ve heard great reviews about the beaches and resorts and shelling on the islands. It’s one of those one-tank trips that makes you feel like you really get away, even though it’s only a few hours drive. I told The Narrator that I’ve always wanted to get down there and how nice it would be to work in a quick trip in sometime.

My Mom has been wanting to come visit for a week in June (our anniversary month), and after chatting with her on the phone this morning, I felt a very strong prompting to get online and look for tickets for her. I discovered there was a sale on tickets that were a good deal and the sale ended today. I called her back and let her know what I found and we discussed a few dates. She said she’d talk to my Dad tonight and get back with me.

About an hour after I had found that airline sale, The Narrator sent me an email with details about a co-workers wedding we have been invited to. On Captiva Island. On our anniversary.

I called my mom back and asked her to look at her calendar again to see if we could shift the dates of her potential trip slightly so she could be here the week over our anniversary so we could go to this wedding and have a mini-getaway. She said that week actually worked better for her schedule.

A couple hours later she sent an email with her itinerary. I’m couldn’t be more excited. It’s going to be a really nice sunset wedding, in a really nice resort, and the thought of getting all dressed up on our anniversary to go to a wedding and just have a nice evening with other adult friends…I’m giddy. And I need a new dress!

As I look over the details, I feel like this is provision from God for being patient, for not pushing for something that would have put us in a bind a year ago, and that we hadn’t really earned. Now a year later, situations have changed and this whole thing fell into our lap when we weren’t expecting it. Thank you, thank you, thank you God, and thank you Dad for letting Mom come down to visit!!

The littlest client

I spent the day behind my sewing machine working for a very important client. And talk about pressure. She was standing over my shoulder all day long supervising my every move.

The request started simply with a dress for her baby. No problem. She had been asking for clothes for the baby for awhile, so I had her pick out the fabric and the pattern from my stash and a cutting and stitching we went. By lunchtime, the dress was complete, and the baby was happy. As she swayed with the baby back and forth my little client sighed, “I’ve been waiting sooooo long!!” I looked at her and said, “For Baby L’s dress? Well, now it’s all done.” She looked at me with wide eyes and said, “Noooo, for MY dress!” That’s when I knew it was going to be a long day.

Next thing I knew, she was picking out matching fabric and a pattern for her own dress and that’s when the “Is it done yet? Is it done yet? Is it done yet?” began. My machined whirred away under her watchful eye. As soon as the bodice was assembled, she whisked it away from me and wriggled it over her little shoulders. She pranced around the sewing room singing, “It’s sooo beautiful, it’s soo beautiful!” I looked at her and said, “Yes, honey, but it’s sooo not done. It needs a skirt yet!” It took some convincing, but finally she handed the bodice back over so I could attach the skirt. It didn’t take her long to realize this wasn’t a simple process.

“NOOOO! I don’t want pockets! Just put the skirt on so I can wear it!”
“Honey, you love pockets! Where will you put your treasures? These are treasure pockets!”
Sigh. “Fine!”

I moved as quickly as I could, and finally it came time to put the skirt on. And she was convinced that I had no idea what I was doing.

“You’re putting it on upside down! Why are you doing it like that? It’s upside down, it’s not going to look right! You’re going to ruin it!! Why are you putting it on upside down???”

And somehow, I just knew that my mother had prayed that morning, “And dear Lord, please help my children to appreciate me and all that I have done for them over the years.” I get it, Mama. I love you for so patiently working with me when I was three. And ten. And sixteen. And thirty-one!

As I watched my little girl wait so impatiently for the beautiful dress that would match her baby doll’s dress, it was like I was looking into a mirror, seeing myself when I was three, hanging on my Mama’s arm while she whipped up a pretty dress for me and my dollies. I felt such a sense of pride that I was passing on the legacy – a heritage of creating with fabric and thread to my own little one. Where else can a girl get matching outfits for her and her baby that she designed herself? Not to mention, it only cost Mama no more than $5.

At long last, the hem was in place and she wriggled that bright yellow dress over her head and danced around the room. The first thing she did? She put a flashlight in that pocket (a flashlight that also doubles as a microphone for singing very long songs about walking down the street).

featured patterns: Simplicity 5419 (dolls dress) and Simplicity 3510 (inspired by Project Runway)
featured fabrics: Tutti Frutti, on sale at JoAnn this week for $1.99 a yard in a great variety of coordinating patterns.

Stuck

I’m waiting for The Narrator to return from Walgreens with my antibiotic and nasal spray. I started to feel yucky Thursday evening and by this morning felt like I’d been hit by a truck. I’ve had enough sinus infections to be able to feel the difference between an infection and a regular cold. As the day progressed, I felt worse and worse and worse until I finally dragged my aching body off the couch and into the car feeling every bump in the road in my bones as I headed to the walk in clinic. I would have toughed it out until Monday, but I was really out of it.

Just as I was getting ready to walk out the door, Little Miss Sunshine said, “Here, Mama, have a sticker!!” She slapped a big, yellow sticker that she had gotten at church tonight on my back (I stayed home on the couch while they went to church). The sticker said, “I can pray to Jesus anywhere.” I was so out of it, that I completely forgot to take the sticker off my back and went through my entire visit at the clinic broadcasting in bright yellow that “I can pray to Jesus anywhere!” No wonder they were so friendly to me!

I hear the door. This is me taking meds and going to bed.

Thanks for the new tires

Every night for a week, Little Miss Sunshine has added to her usual “Thanks for Mommy & Daddy, Thanks for Jesus, Thanks for T-Rex, Thanks for my family and all my friends” bedtime prayer. The new last line has been “Thanks for new tires.”

Last week while making the hour drive home from my Grandma’s, I noticed that the car had some extra tire noise, and some unusual shaking. When The Narrator got home, he inspected the tires to see wire showing on one of the front tires. The next morning, I headed to Sam’s Club with the two kids in tow and we got new front tires. Little Miss Sunshine thought it was quite the adventure to see the tire man with the funny glasses (which was ok, unlike the dentist’s funny glasses) and get new tires. I was thankful to feel safe again and praising Jesus that my tire didn’t blow on the way home from Grandma’s while driving 70 mph on the highway. God was looking out for me on that one.

That was it for me – thanks God for keeping us safe. I really didn’t think about it much beyond that. Until Little Miss kept thanking God in her prayers for the next week for the new tires. The first couple times, I thought it was cute. After a week of her little prayer, I chalked it up to stalling bedtime, and I thought to myself how – I shamefully admit – silly it was to keep thanking Jesus for new tires. It was no big deal. And that’s when God smacked me up side the head.

“Rejoice always; pray without ceasing; in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5: 16-18

I’ve always thought of that verse in terms of hard times. When things are tough – give thanks. When it doesn’t go your way – give thanks. But as Little Miss was praying, God reminded me – everything means everything, even the little good things. Maybe especially the little good things that happen all the time that we take for granted. We’ve saved up for things like tires going bad, so it didn’t register on my radar. And that’s exactly why I needed to be thankful, not just for a week, but always.

We are so blessed, and it can be all too easy to take these modern conveniences for granted. We can easily forget that many, many in the world don’t have these things we call basic necessities. In everything give thanks. Don’t neglect the daily good things that you may think are no big deal.

Thanks for the roof over my head, thanks for a comfortable place to sleep, thanks for a car, thanks for clean running water, thanks for two healthy kids, thanks for safe parks where my kids can run and play, thanks for a yard, thanks for family who love us, thanks for not just food on the table, but a fridge and freezer and pantry full of food, thanks for a washing machine and dryer.

And thanks, God, for the new tires on my car and a little girl who reminds me to give thanks for everything.

Credit Card Girl

I’m sitting in a Panera Bread at the mall (insert fear and trepidation here). I’ve never been a mall gal. In fact, I really don’t like to shop. I prefer to know what I’m after, go in, buy it, and get out, and I always work off a list, whether mental or written. But tonight, I really needed to get out and I needed a place to read and use wi-fi, so Panera it was. Only there’s a concert playing outside. And it’s really busy. So much for a quiet place to read, write and think.

On my way in, I thought I’d stop at one store – New York & Co. Outside of the department stores, this is the one shop I’ll hit in the mall on those rare occasions I’m here. For some reason, their style strikes me most out of the other stores that scream at me to look like this and smell like that and accessorize like this. I’m in the process of creating a new wardrobe for me, and t-shirts are cheap enough to just go ahead and buy. While I was trying a few on, I remembered that I had an old, old gift card in my wallet. What I didn’t realize was that it had $15 on it! I got 2 tees for $5 out of pocket. Totally worth it.

As I was checking out, the cashier asked me if I wanted a rewards card. Why not? It’s about the only place I’ll shop for new clothes, infrequent at that. As she was handing the form to me, I clarified that it was a rewards card, not a credit card. Her reply was one of the best compliments ever, and said in the friendliest way.

“Oh yes, you didn’t look like the credit card type, so I didn’t even ask about that.”
“Aha. You’re right. I’m more of a cash girl. So there’s a ‘look’ for the credit card type?”
“Most definitely, and you don’t look like that.”

I would have probed further to see what she had been trained to look for when pushing the credit card, but there were people in line behind me. Instead, I smirked as I handed her $5.42 in cash. I glanced down at myself and my new knit top (made by me) and my not-so-new olive green linen shorts (made by me) and my glittery $5 clearanced wedge sandals (that the fitting room attendant liked).

She was right. Definitely not the credit card type!

The lonely fish.

We had a mini-tragedy happen around the fish tank today. For a long, long time we’ve had a nearly empty fish tank. Just a week and a half ago, we started to re-fill our tank.

Little Miss Sunshine and The Narrator made a deal that if she cleaned her room every night for a week, we would go get a fish. One fish is much cheaper than the inflated price of allowances these days. I made a little connect the dots page and every night she cleaned her room she connected a dot. When the page was finished (a week later) she had a picture that sort of looked like a fish. Armed with a few dollars in cash, we headed to the pet store for an “orange fish.”

We actually ended up with two orange fish (still cheaper than an allowance) because the one fish would be lonely and needed a buddy. The two orange fish liked their new home and Little Miss Sunshine feeds them every day. T-Rex watches. In fact, they pull a chair up to the fish tank and fish-watch every day. They neglect the tv and head for the fish tank. Love it.

Today, I was out on an errand and missed the action. Apparently, upon feeding time, one of the orange fish appeared to be dead. Not appeared dead. He was dead. The Narrator scooped him out, and forgetting there was a 14 day guarantee, had a flushing funeral. The Narrator told me that Little Miss Sunshine was ok with the dead fish, until it dawned on her that the remaining live fish was lonely. And then the waterworks started, not for the dead fish, but for the live fish.

“I’m sooo sad!! The fish is lonely!! He needs a new buddy!! We have to go to the fish store!!!!!”

By the time I came home, she was calm, but the first thing she told me was that we had to leave right now and go get another buddy for the lonely fish. That is when The Narrator filled me in. How can you deny that $2 request for friendship?

I’ve been reading through the book Captivating as I prepare for our upcoming mini-women’s conference. Tonight I was reading how the relational core of women reflects the image of God. Relational. Little Miss Sunshine is as relational as they get. I asked her to draw a picture of someone we know and the baby they are going to have, and she drew the little family, us on an airplane going to visit them, and a “friend” for the baby. Every night she thanks God for all our friends. She always wants to know who’s coming over today. When is the next party? Who will we see today?

Everyone needs a friend. Even fish. So the lonely orange fish got a new buddy today, and the world is in order again, at least the world of the fish tank. And as she mourned today for the fish left behind and alone, I thought how right she is. Every time we lose someone who loved Jesus, I find myself mourning those of us who are left behind – lonely, missing that person so very much. And at the same time, I find myself yearning for the King’s return, when we will all be united and made whole, never to be lonely again, never to be missing the face or laugh of that loved one, never to be missing the face of Jesus Himself, never to be questioning relationships, never to be doubting love, but to just be. united. Eternity of being together. How I long…

1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

13But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope.

14For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who have fallen asleep in Jesus.

15For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep.

16For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first.

17Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord.

18Therefore comfort one another with these words.

Things that go bump in the night, part 2

One night last week as I was sewing again, I heard another REALLY LOUD BUMP that shook the house. It sounded like something had landed on the roof. A herd of cats? Not unheard of in this neighborhood. An alien spaceship? Maybe not such a far out idea.

This time, fortunately, the Narrator was home and I didn’t have to wake up my Dad who was still 1200 miles away.

“Did you hear that REALLY LOUD BUMP?”
(calmly) “Yes.”
“Don’t you think you should go outside and look and make sure everything is ok and there’s nothing on the roof?”
“It’s dark outside. I won’t be able to see anything.”
“Still, don’t you think you should look?”
(sighs) “Ok, where’s the flashlight?”
“Um…I don’t think we have one.”
(gives me a look that says he’s totally obliging my obsessiveness and heads outside.)
(a few minutes later as he comes back inside) “Didn’t see anything.” (without even a hint of I told you so!)

The next day he comes home from work with a smirk on his face.
“You know that REALLY LOUD BUMP you heard last night?”
“Yeah…”
“All of Florida heard it.”
“What??? Did we have an earthquake???” (does Florida even get earthquakes?)
“It was the space shuttle returning to Florida. It was breaking the sound barrier (with “double sonic booms”). And this is the second time it has returned to Florida recently, so that is probably what you heard that night I was out of town and you woke me up.”

By this time, I am cracking up. One of the first things my dear Dad had mentioned that night of the first REALLY LOUD BUMP was that if something had broken the sound barrier the neighbors would have heard it too. I was like, “Huh? What would be breaking the sound barrier??” Hmm. The space shuttle maybe? Oh my goodness. Well, when was the last time the space shuttle shook YOUR house??